7 Questions for Conscious Change
With focus, clarity and inner wisdom, you have the power to create what you want to have in your life.
1. Does what you want reflect who you are now or who you were? (or even someone else?)
This situation, relationship or challenge is showing you that there is a gap between where it is and where you are… it’s trying to get your attention. While it might be easy to deflect, ignore, or even project (putting attention outward at someone or something else) about the core of this situation, it is really about you, who you are and how you choose to show up in the world.
The perspective you have and the action you take must be based on who you are right now, today, in trust that it is exactly expressing your authentic self. If, on any level, you feel reservation, or that you are “lying” in some way, or that it is the “old” you speaking, you must stop immediately to break the pattern. It is vital that you honor who you are now, and people may not be ready to see the real you. But that is their issue, not yours.
When you are expressing your authentic self, you will feel a lightness, a sense of relief, a freedom, a feeling of your insides lining up. Maybe you can breathe better, or colors seem brighter… whatever your personal sign that shows you are on track, learn to identify it and trust it as you take action from this point forward.
2. What is the extreme projected outcome without change, and is that what you want?
If you were to play out the situation in question to the end, all the way to the end, as it stands right now, what would it look like? Is that the outcome you want?
Sometimes you might not know what you want, but you usually know what you don’t want. So, what is the ultimate outcome of the situation you have in question? Vision it out, somewhat like dominoes or a flow chart. If I do this, then this will happen, and if I don’t do that, then this will happen… in that scenario, is the outcome what you want? Are there other scenarios that could happen, and are they what you want? If yes, map them out as well. Your map becomes your action plan to address what needs to be handled and / or experienced. The answers from this question should result in understanding with more clarity your desired outcome.
3. What do you need to know / learn / get from it?
If a particular situation is revealing itself to you, and especially if you have a reaction to it (a sting, ping or charge), then there is a greater message at work trying to get your attention. It’s important to acknowledge and honor that as it happens; if you don’t get the lesson, opportunity or discovery from it, it will cycle back to you in bigger form. By not paying attention now, you could find yourself in a similar scenario with different people or repeating the same dynamics in a new situation.
The first thing to do is to stop and be in gratitude that this situation has presented to you as a teacher for something you need to know. Ask yourself if there is any similarity from any other times in your life that could be reflected currently to get clues as to what your message might be at this time (take notes on this for yourself – it’s easier to see in writing). If you don’t get anywhere with this tactic, simply ask for a message and wait to see what manifests. Your message may come in the form of a dream, animal symbols, or unusual synchronicities – there are no coincidences.
Once you can articulate your lesson, opportunity or discovery, you are able to create something new. It’s like driving from one coast to the other – if you don’t know where you are starting from, it’s hard to get to where you want to go. Being in awareness, perception and gratitude for the ‘magic in the message’ allows you to gain more insights.
4. What are the possibilities seeded in it?
In every situation, the seeds for possibility, or new growth, lie dormant. In a dormant state, these seeds don’t have the capacity to get your attention unless you actively seek them. You must use fresh eyes to discover these possibilities. Even when you find them, they may not be what you expected, or be more prolific than predictable for more choices than you were prepared to make, or you may recognize them as being there all along.
You’ll know a possibility seed when you find it, because if it is real, it will wait for you to discover it. It may happen in an “a-ha” kind of way, or sneak up on you with an easy feeling. It may feel like the possibility is a little crazy, and you won’t know how you are to achieve it, but you don’t need to know that in the moment. What is important is visualizing the results to determine if it could be something you want. Once you make that decision, the resources will come to you in the actualization process.
The most important aspect of this part of the process is to be aware that there are new options presenting somewhere, some way. As you open to the new energies, you may be led to even more potentials – only you can decide when you have enough possibilities to choose what you would like to manifest next.
5. What are you willing to release around / through it?
A lot of life comes down to making choices at every level. For example, when you want to buy new clothes, but your closet is already full, you have to choose what to let go of – it will either be to not go shopping or to release something already there. If you want to go to lunch with a friend, and you have a full day scheduled, you have to release that lunch on that day, or let go of something already scheduled. While you have infinite capacity, your time is still 24/7.
In your current situation, through this process, you already have a lot of information. You know who you are, you know what the extreme projected outcome would be without change, you know your lesson / opportunity / discovery, and you know the possibilities from it. From this new awareness, it is time to determine what you need, and are willing, to release in order to make room for whatever is evolving.
It might be that you need to release an old habit, pattern, relationship, thought, belief, routine, way of being. Or it might be a project, job, client or an attachment you have to something. Whatever it is that needs to be released, find it so you can let it go and you will discover that you feel lighter because now you have made room for what is coming in as your next conscious creation.
6. What is your conscious change choice?
Here is the turning point… based on everything you now know, you are knowingly CHOOSING your change. Once you make the choice, it will manifest and you will be accountable for it in some way. Whatever you conceive and create belongs to you – this is no accident.
You are not simply reacting, or doing it the way you used to do it, because you are no longer the same person you were. There are no excuses because you are proactively making a decision about your wants, needs and desires. You cannot escape yourself here, because you are at choice.
In making this choice, you may need to consider a variety of options. Choose the one that feels right to you. If, while thinking of a single option, your body gets heavy, tight or you find you aren’t “breathing”, this is not the best option for you. Your choice should feel right, and your body is a barometer for how this choice resonates with you on a cellular level. It should pull all parts of you forward to being your best. It may not be the easiest choice, but it is likely to give you the most benefit in the long run.
7. How can you anchor your conscious change commitment in your environment?
Now that you have made your conscious change choice, it is important to set yourself up for success because you are actively creating your outcome.
That being said, once you have planted your conscious change seed, it’s important to not dig it up every day to see if it’s growing. You have to release your attachment to it, and yet, give it support to grow. It’s a delicate balance.
Since your environment is the outward expression of your internal self, the best way to anchor your commitment is actually in your space. The idea is to make it part of your everyday world, so it belongs and is comfortable there. The way this occurs is very personal; you might write and frame it for your desk, have a special object infused with the energy of this choice so it is held and perceptible only to you, or you might create a piece of art that incorporates this choice.
You might feel compelled to share this momentous choice with everyone you know, and that would be counter-productive. Think of a helium balloon that is getting ready to soar, and then see little pin pricks in it – it loses helium and can’t fly anymore. That’s the concept of sharing without discretion; that is, you must use good discernment in sharing your choice. If we go back to the new seed idea, sharing with someone who won’t understand but wants to help is like inviting a well-meaning but clumsy child in to your flower bed – and what child wouldn’t want to “help” (as in, dig up, check on, overwater, talk to, “hold”, pack in tightly, etc.) the seed?